Unwrapping an Imperfect Christmas
December is here and with it the start of the festive season. For some it brings joy as they embrace all that the season brings for others (read that as mothers) it can be a totally overwhelming time. The pressure to create the perfect holiday season for your family can suck all the joy out Christmas.
This Christmas I am focusing on slowing down and embracing the Christmas that we have rather than trying to create an impossibly perfect day.
Life on the farm does tend to create a slightly different Christmas day for us than most people. The movie image that most people have is a family spending Christmas morning in their pyjamas, opening presents in front of a roaring fire while watching the snow falling softly outside the window. Oh, what a lovely image.
There are a few things wrong with this picture though, the first being that we live in Australia. Christmas day means 30 degrees and trying to find a cool spot for the day.
The second is that our cows don’t understand that’s its Christmas day and refuse to take a day off. The cows must be milked twice a day 365 days a year. The simple fact of the life we have chosen means that Christmas day is not a day off for us. And while we have a great team, they have families they want to visit and little kids to spend those exciting Christmas mornings with.
Last year our holiday plans took an unexpected turn thanks to an unwelcome guest called COVID. The usual Christmas lunch with a large family gathering took a backseat. But you know what? It wasn’t all bad. It turned out to be a slower and quieter day but in a good way.
While the boys were disappointed, they still got to see their grandparents for a short period outside and then got to spend the rest of the day playing with all their presents.
As an adult it can be easy to overlook just how monumental Christmas is for kids and the expectations that are put on them. The Christmas anticipation begins with all the twinkling light displays, the excitement of Santas imminent arrival and the longing for items on their wish list. Add to that the gathering of all the family together and it can become a sensory overload for them. In our haste to meet the demands of the day, whether its rushing through opening the presents, meeting the timeline for lunch or, in our completing the necessary farm chores, we get to the end of the day and realise we didn’t actually have the time to enjoy it. Its not just about the gifts or the festive feast its about creating an environment where out kids get to enjoy the day without feeling pressured or rushed.
We are often so focused on the kids at Christmas that we put an insane amount of pressure on ourselves. So lets talk about dropping the ball during the chaotic Christmas season. Its all too easy to feel the weight of expectations pressing down on us. I know personally that I have a habit of setting extremely high standards for myself, more than I would ever put on anyone else. This is fuelled by love and the determination to create a memorable holiday for our family. It can be a hard pill to swallow though when you realise that perfection, especially during a time as frenzied as Christmas, is an elusive goal. There were plenty of years especially when the boys were younger that I put so much pressure on myself to create the perfect Christmas. I would say this is quite common for new mums and babies first Christmas.
As the years have passed I have dropped the ball on many Christmas moments that I thought were so important but ultimately were just a blip in time quickly forgotten. Embracing these moments not only lightens the load we carry as mums but fosters an environment where we can fully embrace the natural moments of happiness.
We are set for another quiet Christmas this year and I can honestly say I’m quite looking forward to it. Between milking the cows we will have time to spend with the boys, explore their gifts and make memories that will be with them forever. This festive season focus on what is really important to you and your family. Don’t let the hype of the season and the pressure to do everything take over from enjoying this time. Allow yourself to drop a few balls, embrace the imperfections and enjoy Christmas without the stress.
What is your Christmas period looking like this year and what can you do to slow down this holiday period?